Cellular Phones:
InfoWeb Directory Page

Overview

This page is under construction. Take a look around. Enjoy the view of the plumbing. You might even find some interesting stuff. Watch your step, but it's unlikely you'll be physically harmed, so I thought I'd put this page live on the site while I write the content for it. I'm even setting up an email address so you can contact me, your humble author. I'd put it right here, but I need to consult the tech guys about how to do it in a spam-proof manner first. In the meantime, the rest of this tab is written in pseudo-Latin, even if the prose is so classic you'll probably recognize it immediately! So, while I get back to work on the architecture of this directory entry, and develop semantics on the page to match, have a lovely time reading this. I think it's about a woman named Lorem, but I'm nore sure as I don't know much about Latin...

Who is Lorem anyway?

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit, sed diam nonummy nibh euismod tincidunt ut laoreet dolore magna aliquam erat volutpat. Ut wisi enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exerci tation ullamcorper suscipit lobortis nisl ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis autem vel eum iriure dolor in hendrerit in vulputate velit esse molestie consequat, vel illum dolore eu feugiat nulla facilisis at vero eros et accumsan et iusto odio dignissim qui blandit praesent luptatum zzril delenit augue duis dolore te feugait nulla facilisi. Nam liber tempor cum soluta nobis eleifend option congue nihil imperdiet doming id quod mazim placerat facer possim assum.

Need more Background?

Typi non habent claritatem insitam; est usus legentis in iis qui facit eorum claritatem. Investigationes demonstraverunt lectores legere me lius quod ii legunt saepius. Claritas est etiam processus dynamicus, qui sequitur mutationem consuetudium lectorum. Mirum est notare quam littera gothica, quam nunc putamus parum claram, anteposuerit litterarum formas humanitatis per seacula quarta decima et quinta decima. Eodem modo typi, qui nunc nobis videntur parum clari, fiant sollemnes in futurum.

Contract Based Service

This tab is about contracts, sometimes the term "contract phone" is used to distinguish this approach to getting service from the newer "prepaid phone" approach. While this section is in development, we present an actual paragraph from a Verizon contract. There were more paragraphs than I could count, so I'm not sure where this one was in the contract... ... I'm joking of course... well, maybe not really. This was probably a boiler-plate section of the contract while it was in development...

Plain-English Contract Example Text

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit, sed diam nonummy nibh euismod tincidunt ut laoreet dolore magna aliquam erat volutpat. Ut wisi enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exerci tation ullamcorper suscipit lobortis nisl ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis autem vel eum iriure dolor in hendrerit in vulputate velit esse molestie consequat, vel illum dolore eu feugiat nulla facilisis at vero eros et accumsan et iusto odio dignissim qui blandit praesent luptatum zzril delenit augue duis dolore te feugait nulla facilisi. Nam liber tempor cum soluta nobis eleifend option congue nihil imperdiet doming id quod mazim placerat facer possim assum.

Taxes

Click on the "Prepaid" tab above to read important information abour taxes!

Prepaid Service

Now that most Americans (and most consumers globally as well) seem to be so far in debt that they have no credit anymore... well, the cell phone providers had to come up with a new way to provide service without trusting customers to pay their bills, or else go out of business. Hence, the birth of Prepaid Service.

The Secret of Prepaid Service

The dirty little secret of Prepaid service, at least here in America, is one that I have yet to find mentioned anywhere. So, I guess it's my secret for now. Except you're reading this, so now I'll have to kill you :-( So, before I kill you, I may as well go ahead and tell you the whole thing. That's how they do it in the movies, right? I discovered this by looking at my bill, doing the math, and then ending my Sprint/Nextel contract at the end of the line so I didn't have to worry about paying an early termination fee.

Okay, here's the secret. True pay-as-you-go plans aren't taxed. Yet. Yup, when you pay your phone bill from a regular phone carrier, like Verizon or Vonage, you'll notice the total rate of taxation is around 35-55%, and the same holds true only moreso with "contract phone" service. There are taxes for everything: your Senator's mother, the Spanish American War, and various federal, state, local, and corruption taxes. Comon, guys, The Spanish-American War began in April 1898. Hostilities halted in August of that year, and the Treaty of Paris was signed in December. What's with the taxes on our phone service? Tea party anyone?

I'm not done with the subject of taxes yet. If you have cable service, you'll probably notice that their telephone service is tax free. This is a pay-off arrangement made at the time the Cable company negotiated franchise taxes with your town or city. Instead of Federal, State, or Local taxes, the taxes are hidden in the price, and a similar amount goes into the pockets of local politicians. Or something along those lines. Now that you know this, if I don't kill you, your local politicans will.

Just remember, that if you're paying $.14/min on a contract plan for overage, at a 50% tax rate, that's actually $.21/min, and you should factor that into your comparisons. Just saying...

Phones: Brick, Clam, Flip, Slider, Slice, Smart, PDA, Dumb, Whatever...

Here are some brief stories about people and their phones...

The Disposable Society

While I suspect that this society will be disposed of in short order, at the present time, disposable hi-tech gadgets made of energy intensive processes from rare non-renewable resources in vast quantities and shipped half-way around the world are the order of the day.

Protecting Your Gadget There's nothing worse than making the financial and emotional investment in a good looking phone, and then, before you know it, something happens and it's permanently scarred. While this is going to happen sooner or later, there are things you can do to put that day off. First, a belt or purse holder for the phone provides a safe place to keep your phone. Second, snap-on cases are available inexpensively at most malls today that can protect your gadget when it's not in its carrying case.

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